Your marriage is supposed to be the reason you laugh and sing rather than the reason you cry and wish you were somewhere, anywhere else! Remember however that a great marriage does not come about by wishful thinking alone. It takes hard work, a bucket load of endless love, full commitment and complete investment of oneself to the relationship to keep going even when the going gets tough!
Read two free chapters of Knockingonheaven’sdoor by the author here:
Lets face it folks marriage is hard work! When its great, it is heavenly! When its not so great it can feel as if all of hell has been let loose! Husbands, wives, there is no shame in seeking help if your marriage needs it. What matters is being determined to do everything you can to make your marriage work. If that means getting counselling or going on a marriage course, then swallow your pride and do it. At the end of the day can you put a price tag on a marriage that feels like it was made in heaven? If thats the kind of marriage you want, then it stands to reason that it is wise to put the work and effort in. Surely the truth is that such renewed commitment, can infuse life even into the deadest of marriages!
Don’t take your commitment to your spouse lightly! Your commitment to one another must not just be through words only or your marriage will fail! Your actions and the things you don’t say, will often give the game away, so mean and do what you say! Become a person of your word. Let your yes be yes, and your no, be no. Don’t be ambiguous and play games. Your spouse may just take you at your word and you may regret the result!
Marriage tip of the day: Aim to be on the same page as your spouse!
Of course we are all different, but as a married couple what used to be two units is now one! When I was single I was free to do what ever I wanted to do. I didn’t have to think about or consult anyone else if I thought something was a good idea. I aimed to please myself. Once Nigel and I made the commitment to be together, we became a husband and wife team. Now there were two of us to think of. Any union between us could only be possible following an agreement to give and take. I have to admit I have not always got the balance of this right, and this has inevitably caused conflict. I have learned the hard way, that I cannot expect to continue to live as if I am single when I am married. It is unwise and would be like struggling to save up, managing to get a mortgage to buy your dream house, achieving an equilibrium, and then using a bulldozer to tear down the very home you have lovingly built! Don’t get me wrong you can still have and pursue dreams when you are married. However it is much wiser to consider how your spouse and the marriage will be affected, during the pursuit! It is also a good idea to consult with them, include them and seek their blessing and support. It will be much more of a dream come true if your loved one is in your corner, beaming with pride as you achieve your goals! That has got to be better than fulfilling your dreams and regretfully having no one to share it with!
Having Nigel makes my life richer and I thank God that he loves me. When I talk things over with him I get a clarity I didn’t have on my own. He helps me see the whole perspective and often the missing pieces of the puzzle. I believe through gaining a deeper understanding of one another, we support and enrich each other, as we remind our spouse why they are blessed rather than cursed to have us!